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Sunday, September 30, 2012

Vietnam Trip Part 1

Dear Blog,
 I can't just think of a catchy title right now.

Anyway i am back to home. Home sweet home.I was from my GEP Trip to Vietnam for SVM/ADN students. The experience to Vietnam was definitely an eye opener for me. From the traffic to the cultural life as a whole. I am glad to be born in singapore when you don't have to face the life of real poverty. Let me break down my reflection into days.

Day 1

As we touched down to the hotel from the airport.The traffic was really scary. Motorcycles speeding like nobody business, cars selfishly horning buses to give way and well traffic just basically castrophic. Besides the traffic experience, we had a pre-tour to the ben thanh market to plan for our shopping list on Wednesday. Bought myself a wrist band pretty cool though. After that i wanted to eat maggi with my roommate so around midnight (vietnam time), my roommate and i called the reception just to provide us with the2 bowls and 2 pairs of cultery. First they bought just a spoon because they do not understand what we were saying but eventually they did when we show some actions.

Day 2

We went to Can Gio island. Uhmm went to monkey island to see monkeys and crocs.What was shocking was that we attended an animal circus. We saw how the monkeys, dogs and crocodiles were being treated by thier handlers..It was so crude, the animals didn't want to perform but they were forced to.I can see how sad they were. The most sympathy and rage that was building inside me was for the crocodile.The tail was being cut off and they play with it's mouth like it's a toy.They use wood to force the croc to snap its mouth with the wood.The process repeats itself. It's wasn't a show it was torture. As animal lover myself, i felt disgusted with the way this performance went.They still have the cheek to force the monkey to walk around with a bowl to let people put their cash in. I had a small chat with nadhira about her secondary school life and her talent as a singer.Worth it. Eugene had to sawed away his lock as he locked his luggage with the keys inside. In the afternoon we went to play with our teambuilding games at the beach..One word to describe the beach, breathtaking. It was simple no trees around just the sands and the sea BUT the view was indeed breathtaking. If i actually did watch the sunset i am sure the view will be 10 times amazing..
So we had campfire afterwards where Thaii (our tour guide) taught us some vietnamese poems.Pretty cool though..After that eat Maggi again.This time when my roommate and i called the receptionist, they do not understand what we were saying.The funny part they had a technician coming over with a torchlight and bottle of hot boiling water.That was just plain epic.We had to act it out to make sure that they understand what were trying to say.Eventually they did but i won't forget that experience anytime soon it was just epic.

Part 2 will posted later today..Too tired. will attached some pictures as well.

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

One Direction...


And yes i do listen and like some of their songs especially What Makes You Beautiful.

Well sorry for the absence. I am kinda clueless what to blog about but maybe i just pen out what's on my mind now...

Well one i am like tevez last season self - exiling myself towards my cca during the month of august. Well there was no cca during the month of august. I mean WTF...So much for self - exile, i heard it go suspended, changed hands and so forth. Actually i kinda like this because the previous management doesn't give a shit about the cca.. Like what most people would say "We only exist when they need something." but ouh well let's just hope that the new management is better than the previous one.


I may not be a love guru or anything but this has been bugging my mind for quite a while already because it's about relationships..Ok let me be more specific about it. Girls.

I mean ok i can safely say that sometimes whatever guys are saying to their girlfriends, they are thinking with their dicks and not their brains and it may hurt BUT i am sure they didn't mean what they say so. It just that i think they couldn't figure out a way to break the news without hurting the girl they love too much. Yeah that's more like it.

What's even more intriguing is that some guys tend to take control over in their relationship. They are controlling the actions of their girls.The funny fact is that they are doing a lot of discreet stuff like having a drink with other girls, clubbing etc etc. behind their girls back and worst of all deny it. Respect to the ladies who have encountered or going through this. I may not know how you all actually feel but i know that you will do certain things to make your partners happy and to keep the relationship strong.Kudos to you.No sex alright until marriage? HAHAHAHAHAHA (just adding humor if it's bad, forgive me)

To the guys out there, please spare me the bullshit but if your partner able adapt to their limits that you set for them up i guess you could too adapt to theirs right?

I just hate it if guys were to be dominant in their relationship. I mean come on what are the chances of she cheating on your relationship if you trust her? Yes yes i know she might take advantage of it just like you would too but if she talking about you with your friends and her friends then kudos to you because she's yours. What i can just say is just give them their personal space sometimes because it's not only just you exist  on her mind but her family and friends as well.

So this brings me to the next topic.


Please shut the fuck up when you girls say this.Yes i mean it. Don't because of one guy who is a jerk, you assume that all guys are the same because if you think it like that then girl your love is blind. Yes i say it's blind because your just being shallow.Look at the bigger picture please.

There are some guys who's been trying their best to make the girl they like to notice them but sadly they don't. Instead they go for jerks, smitten by their looks and getting hook up with them in the matter of weeks. So when things don't work out between him and you, you go crying to your friends and telling that all guys are jerks. So where's the nice guy who's been trying hard to make you notice him? Ouh yeah, he's been...


I don't know, like i said i am not a love guru or anything. I personally think the most successful relationship comes from the guy who's actually really cares about you, been there for you both your highs and your lows, cheering you on and does stupid things with you and ensure that your happy when you see him.In other words like what i been reading on the loves quotes, facebook picture post and twitter like a best friend. (of course i am still a firm believer that a girl best friend could be a guy.Nothing more nothing less). Look what i am just trying to say is to keep your heart open. You'll be surprised on how different your relationship could be.

Yes i know, you want guys to tell you that they love you. The reasons why guys don't want to say it because they want to show it first and then when the time is right they will say it. The problem with that is it may be too late but heck the effort is there. Maybe if you leave your heart open who knows he's the one. So stop friendzoning (if thats a word) people.

This is just my opinion.On the honest side all i just wish is that girls should stop the friendzone of people...That's all.

Sunday, March 25, 2012

Just my Sunday

Today was kinda fun actually.Considering that work for me was usually boring.My colleagues and i went to play around with the olympus tough series cameras...Oh my god compared to the fujifilm xp30, olympus tough cameras have a lot of cool effects such as puzzle blocks,mirrors,black and white,movie directing in which the xp 30 doesn't have.

It was kinda shocking after that as a guy went into the store just to buy 2 Cannon EOS 5d Mark III kit.In addition he paid it in COLD HARD CASH.I mean come on just that one kit cost $5549.He bought 2 and paid fully in cash.Who would actually dare to bring 10 k to Funan? That's totally insane.My colleague, Heidi who was serving him was shock with the cash he bought.The cashier itself felt like as though she had hit Jackpot.

Seeing those DSLR the EOS 600D selling like hotcakes makes me feel that i should have bought one also but then again i need to start doing my financial planning.After my ITE i want to travel across Europe.Meet my older sister and relax before i go for my National Service or Poly.Thought of bringing some friends along but question is who??I wanna enjoy this moment with them.

So currently right now i am planning this friday lesson with my juniors.I wanna do Podcast with them.Work on Nu'Man and Hakim Talkset.I want them to give a goood charade on the opening day..I know they can do it.

Sadly i may come for just a short while, play a cameo or so OR not come at all.My older sister is coming back and I will definitely want to meet her at the airport .Rio is working and well i am short of manpower.There's still Herwan but i know he needs the help he can get...

Hmmm decisions and priorities...

Friday, March 23, 2012

An unfavorable leader proving a point.

The fire i showed to my juniors.I told them that this is the fire i would like to see in them whenever they come into CrC.The amount of passion that they have for this cca inside them.Through this picture they understand how much this means to me.And i thanked them for that.

I just feel like pouring this out.

I know i wasn't the preferred choice to co-lead my cca. To be honest i really don't wish to co-lead a club at first but i am here to prove myself a point.Whether you guys WANT to give that chance is up to you.Hate me if you think i am being hard on my group.I want them to know that CrC is not just a fun club.It is a place to learn and the place where passion play a strong part in the club itself.I don't want them to take the cca lightly.I want them to learn that the cca is a place where they could meet their objectives in life and to grow up with it.Be and outspoken person stand out of the crowd.

There's a reason why i give them those topics.I don't just give it out FOR NOTHING.I want them to be prepared for whats there to come.I want them to think wider.Branch out.Make the topic a bit more interesting.I don't want to hear common facts.I want to hear opinions WITH smart facts.Lastly INITIATIVE.I been telling my juniors time and time again when in doubt ask questions.

"A smart person would ask question to make him smarter.Whereas a smart person who doesn't ask is just a fool like everyone else."

Right now my motivation level for my own cca is draining due to the lack of motivation and support you guys have given me.I wanna change the mindset and view of CrC as the cca but if you guys don't give me that chance i can't do it.I just have to wait until you guys are officially gone and that's where i start to stamp my mark in.I may not know or forgot how the previous president treats you guys BUT i am here to run the cca the way i look at it each day i walk past the room.I run it with passion to learn and to make it as fun and enjoyable for everyone.




Look i am not saying i am completely right about this.I shouldn't have scolded or shown that attitude in front of you guys.It's just that i am frustrated that you guys are not allowing me to teach the way i want to teach.It's like i am the current oic but my subordinates are the ones who are giving orders.I don't like that.It's like you guys have no confidence with me at all.AT ALL. I am pushing my juniors higher.Stand away from the comfort zone because i want to see them as successful campus radio dj's.The juniors understand why i am being hard on them and they respect me for doing it.They know the expectations that i want from them and they are fully committed in meeting those expectations.I want them to make goals for themselves in CrC. Not come in without goals.They are eager to broadcast as soon as possible.I let them provided they can handle the training i am giving to them even if i have to be a dick to them.Even as i wrote this Hakim and Nu'man the ones ready to do the opening show are doing their talkset now and want me to vet on it as soon as it is done.That level of commitment i have to be proud of them because they meet my expectations.AGAIN I AM FUCKING PROUD OF THEM.At least i know i have done something right.They understand that i am doing this to bring the best out of them.Something in which i see in them and i don't see in myself before.That level of commitment,passion and sense of urgency.I have to respect them for this.

And by that i am an unfavorable leader trying to prove a point.

Hate me or like me for this doing this it's up to you.Just don't keep it quiet at all and create a rift between us.I don't like it.I am here to learn and willing to accept criticism even if it breaks my heart o hear it.I want to improve.

CrC is not just a cca for me.It's a place where the fire burns inside me.My passion and the determination of my goals that i wanna achieve in my life it's all in there.

I am sorry if this post were to offend anyone but this is how i feel currently right now.If i were to lose friends because of this then it's okay i accept it.I finally felt cheerful that i let it all out.

Thursday, March 8, 2012

Paths and Routes.

Dear friends,

I know you care but i gotta face this route alone.If i were to depend on you guys i am pathetic.I just wanna say thanks for caring.It's now left me to me if i can pick myself from this.I am doing it slowly.One step at a time.I can't change overnight.It takes time.Hey i am still the happy cheerful dude that you know and will always be.

"I still have you guys and that is more than enough."

Monday, March 5, 2012

"beautiful girls all over the world
i could be chasing but my time would be wasted
they got nothin' on you baby "

Bruno Mars

So today had my writing for business paper.I did kinda alright.Not that hard not that easy as well.Just an ordinary paper to me.After that, went home to change and meet friend Shafiqah.We ate Long John Silver.Discuss about ghost and spirits (oo paranormal) but yeah.I know there are many different kind of spirits out there but why always when people describe it it's white?In my own encounters (yes i did encounter one when i was 7 years back then) it was a black cloaked figure.Funny thing it was pitch black that time and i still can see it..Hmm..Different maybe..

After eating at long john we went around looking for items.Though we couldn't find what we wanted Fiqah decided to head to LOT 1 (shopping mall) just to buy GongCha(bubbletea).I then followed fiqah send fiqah to Boon Lay by bus from LOT 1.We separate from there onwards.As she gotta go back early.

Well that pretty sums up my day.I know it's boring but i can't just think of any topic to write for now..So i decided to leave song lyrics extracts on this blog post.Do read and understand what it meant.Bonus would be if you actually take the time to listen to it. Until then,have a good day.

"What doesn't kill you makes you stronger
Stand a little taller
Doesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm alone
What doesn't kill you makes a fighter
Footsteps even lighter
Doesn't mean I'm over 'cause you're gone"

Kelly Clarkson - Stronger

"I’mma be what I set out to be, without a doubt undoubtedly
And all those who look down on me I’m tearing down your balcony"

Eminem - Not Afraid

"But who are you to judge
When you’re a diamond in the rough"

Selena Gomez And The Scene - Who Says

"Throw your sticks and stones
Throw your bombs and blows
But you're not gonna break my soul
This is the part of me
That you're never gonna ever take away from me, no"

Katy Perry - Part Of Me
"When the sun shines, we'll shine together
Told you I'll be here forever
Said I'll always be a friend
Took an oath I'ma stick it out till the end"
Umbrella - Rihanna Ft Jay-Z

ouh i forgot...

I am slowly moving on.


Sunday, March 4, 2012

When i am in a relationship.

I will..

1) Let my partner have her own personal space.

I do not want her to see me everyday.I know it may be sweet and all that but don't you get bored seeing one another everyday? Ouh and calling and texting every hour or so?I mean it would be better if you save up the conversation for three days or so?That way you get more to talk about + it makes talking and meeting the partner more meaningful.Besides i would want her to hang out with her other friends as well.

2)Trust fully

Well a successful relationship is build by the trust one has towards the other.I mean i don't mind if my partner hangs out with other guys as as she knows her limits.Then to me it's okay.

3)Not to control.

This and trust are co-relates with one another in a relationship.I mean i don't like it if i were to restrict my partner from doing certain things.I know she doesn't like it either.If i were to control,it shows that i don't trust her you see.I will trust my partner that she won't do anything stupid.Therefore i won't put rules between us.

Commitment and be there when she needs you.

Not much to be said.You should know what i meant. 

(This is my opinion.My perception may change.)
Anyway my weekends were great.Although the job may be boring.My other colleagues make use of it by experimenting the Altec Subwoofer base.I can honestly swear the items that are hanging at the walls are shaking due to bass sound from the subwoofer..That's how deep the bass is.I wanna buy but i just do not know where to put it....


Saturday, March 3, 2012

Live My Life

I would like to thank Zee for chatting with me the entire afternoon and night.

Anyways back to the topic, I been a pessimist before.You know being negative like for almost everything.The hardest setback is the day I confessed to someone.I thought I could get over it somehow it was harder than it seems.At least I am progressing slowly.

"Your still my close friend.You changed me and that I say thank you."

After the vow,I realized there's more to life than love.Although I been telling myself "I just want a companion".I then noticed what are my friends are there for in the first place?they been through my nonsense with me.They been there done that way before me.Although they are now either in a relationship,engaged and happily married (yes I have friends who are married) . They told me to enjoy being single, live your life being single before entering a new chapter in your story.

"God still made you single because he wants you to know there's more to life than falling in love.HE is still writing that perfect love story for you in hope that you be patient with him to let it publicize it for you later in life."

So yes now I am gonna enjoy my life being single.Look at the upside of it.I met my other friends who are girls had fun with them in which those in relationship suffers because of the the rules set by the opposite sex and the level of trust they have for one another.(I found this sad because I lost a couple of good opposite sex friends due to this just to save their relationship sigh.) Hopefully when I meet my soulmate I will be happy and proud that I fall in love with her..

In which my next blog I will write my values should i fall in a relationship.till then,


Thursday, March 1, 2012


Yo bloggers i do like to share this with you..

Is difficult telling yourself that you won’t fall for her but you did.The way she look at you to the way she smile.It brings out those shivers in you.Anticipation,nervousness within you just to tell her “I love you”.Afraid of being rejected from her.Even worse create an air of awkwardness between one another.As a result you will lose the one you care the most.Friendship probably torn apart due to the word “love”.

Then again you may never know that she may embraced it, probably having those same feelings you have for her towards you.It will definitely be a wonderful thing.It may cherished and prosper and it may lead to marriage in the long run.Only if it works out actually.If it doesn’t it will deeply affect you.Mentally and emotionally.The feeling of not wanting to let go but you have to may really tax the most out of you…

Love for me is Evol.It outplays you through your feelings if your aren’t careful..You may end up hurting yourself the most in the end.

Do you think this is true?
Do think about it.



Wednesday, February 29, 2012

My Vow


Yeah i couldn't think of any other greeting to greet my bloggers.But yes as the title suggest i am making vow to myself and to all the bloggers out there reading this.I am gonna change, not for the worse but for the better.

I vowed that...

I will be happy no matter how shitty my life can be.No matter what adversaries i face i will conquer it positively.This is my story and i will not let my emotions get the better of me.No more.

I do still think of you.Yes i do.

I want to move on forget about you.It's slowly fading.Though it may be painful for me but i know it has to be done.Its got to be done.I don't want to hope anymore.It's stupid i know.So yeah,I will move on.Slowly but surely

Someday i will meet the one.She's there for me i just have to find.Patience is virtue.My virtue if i were to follow it.I want her to love me as much i love her.I want to write my story together with her.

Thank You..
Herwan & Mylia for pointing to me the right direction.For enduring my shits.I know i am the dude who sulks like almost 24 hours.The dude who's negative when you approach him.I just wanna say i am

I will change not because of you two but for myself.I wanna make myself happy.I wanna make you guys happy because i change.I don't wanna just say it i wanna do it.

I treasure the time we spent together as friends..No as siblings.I couldn't say more.You guys are always there for me.For me i just have to thank God for making me meet both of you.Thank you.Your the part of my change.My new vision of my life.I hope our friendship last.

Same goes for you too.You know who you are.I just hope we are still close friends and the promise we kept.
You still mean something to me.That part would never change.

I love my friends.They are all the pillars of strengths that kept me going.

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

You and I

Yes you..
As i read back my previous post,i know i am lying to myself when i try to forget you.Girl your everything to me.Yes everything.From my hype attitude and to my sadness..To my sorrows and to my happiness.Meeting you change me.Changed me for being who i am.I never like someone as much as you and to be honest your the one who keeps crossing my mind.I can never forget you and the smile you bring in.

I like you for being you.

When you said that you have problem with life and that you don't wish to tell me i feel kinda sad.I want to help you i really do.Yes i may say "i don't wanna know what it is about" but in actual truth what i wanna say was "I wanna know what happen why it happen?Because i wanna help i don't wanna disappoint you.I wanna feel sympathy together with you" because girl i don't wanna see you sad. Like i said the last thing i wanna see is to see you sad.That is not you.Though i may not be part of our life but your still special to me.And that will never change.You know when your sad i am sad and when you cry i cry.(YES PATHETIC i know but like i said your everything to me.)So please don't be sad.Sadness is the last thing i wanna see from you.

Your my motivator,not my demotivator.

"She's the type that makes everybody go crazy.The type where she makes them crazy but at the same time stay true to themselves .The type where she can find joy even at the most saddest of time.Most importantly she the type where she pushes everybody out of their comfort zone and made them think why is there a success story in their life...:)"

Sunday September 11 blog post

The Confession...

You know after the confession, after you left, i cried silently. When you said you were sorry your attached, deep inside i felt hurt.I didn't wanted to show you how i really feel because it will be stupid for me to do so.I also do not want you to see me cry.They say when a guy cry for a girl it means something. To me it means that the guy really loves you.He really do.I cried because i love you but also that it was too late to tell you that.When i said every moment that i spent with you was priceless and indeed i treasure every last one of it.Our moments together is irreplaceable.And when you asked me how long did i love you?I remembered i said from the day i met you to this hour,this minute,this second and now.When you were around our friends i am like "oh shit she's here what am i supposed to do?What am i supposed to say?" .Hahaha the wonders of love it makes you do stupid things. If only i could hug you i will hug you tight because i would never want to let you go because your my everything..Though i must accept the harsh truth..

Your attached.
It's really stupid but i keep telling myself if your relationship do not workout, would i still have a chance with you? I told myself no i want your relationship with him to last till marriage and till death pull both you apart.(i will pray for that.Like i said i don't want to see you sad.)

My promise..

My promise is that i will never leave by your side.To always be there standing right next to you and help you,advice you and cheer you on to fight the negatives of life together whether it's mine or yours.

"I am still your close friend no matter what happens.Till the very end."
Sunday September 11 blog post

Till the very end.
I just wanna tell you that...

Girl, God has given you a beautiful soul.I love you.

I know your reading this and i am prepared to face the consequences of losing you as a close friend(in which i hope it never happens).But yeah i am in love with you.Moving on would be hard because your the only girl that i did something about it rather than saying it.and for you i will try.I will try.

I will try to move on.

I will not keep any secrets about myself from you.

*due to the contents of this blog i decided to keep it private.Only those who are really really close with me could read my blog.