Friday, March 23, 2012
An unfavorable leader proving a point.
I just feel like pouring this out.
I know i wasn't the preferred choice to co-lead my cca. To be honest i really don't wish to co-lead a club at first but i am here to prove myself a point.Whether you guys WANT to give that chance is up to you.Hate me if you think i am being hard on my group.I want them to know that CrC is not just a fun club.It is a place to learn and the place where passion play a strong part in the club itself.I don't want them to take the cca lightly.I want them to learn that the cca is a place where they could meet their objectives in life and to grow up with it.Be and outspoken person stand out of the crowd.
There's a reason why i give them those topics.I don't just give it out FOR NOTHING.I want them to be prepared for whats there to come.I want them to think wider.Branch out.Make the topic a bit more interesting.I don't want to hear common facts.I want to hear opinions WITH smart facts.Lastly INITIATIVE.I been telling my juniors time and time again when in doubt ask questions.
"A smart person would ask question to make him smarter.Whereas a smart person who doesn't ask is just a fool like everyone else."
Right now my motivation level for my own cca is draining due to the lack of motivation and support you guys have given me.I wanna change the mindset and view of CrC as the cca but if you guys don't give me that chance i can't do it.I just have to wait until you guys are officially gone and that's where i start to stamp my mark in.I may not know or forgot how the previous president treats you guys BUT i am here to run the cca the way i look at it each day i walk past the room.I run it with passion to learn and to make it as fun and enjoyable for everyone.
IF YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH HOW I RUN THE CLUB YOU PERSONALLY TELL ME.YOU DON' JUST KEEP IT QUIET.I AM THE PROBLEM BUT I AM WILLING TO LISTEN AND LEARN MY MISTAKES SO THAT I CAN IMPROVE ON THEM.
AND WHEN YOU GUYS SAY I DON'T CARE ABOUT THIS. I FEEL LIKE YOU GUYS DON'T KNOW ME THAT WELL ENOUGH.I LOVE MY CCA.I LOVE YOU GUYS EVEN MORE.WHEN YOU GUYS WERE DOWN OR SHARE PROBLEMS I LISTEN AND DID MY BEST TO HELP. EVEN THOUGH I AM SICK AND LITERALLY HAVE NO VOICE TO TEACH I STILL COME AND TEACH.WHEN YOU GUYS I SHOULD REST HOME I SAID NO.I HAVE A ROLE TO FULFILL AND I WILL FULFILLED IT WITH SINCERITY, DIGNITY AND PASSION IN THAT ROLE ITSELF.
WHEN I TWEETED I DIDN'T WANT TO COME BECAUSE I AM SICK THAT'S BECAUSE I AM SICK PLUS MY LEVEL OF MOTIVATION WAS LOW AS ROCK BOTTOM.THEN AGAIN, I REMEMBER THE PROMISE WE MADE AND THE GOALS THAT I WANT TO ACHIEVE WITH THE CLUB.I CAME AND I TEACH ALONE TILL YOU GUYS CAME.(Thanks Rio for being there earlier than me.)SO DON'T YOU GUYS SEE IT?I CARE I FUCKING CARE ABOUT MY CCA.
Look i am not saying i am completely right about this.I shouldn't have scolded or shown that attitude in front of you guys.It's just that i am frustrated that you guys are not allowing me to teach the way i want to teach.It's like i am the current oic but my subordinates are the ones who are giving orders.I don't like that.It's like you guys have no confidence with me at all.AT ALL. I am pushing my juniors higher.Stand away from the comfort zone because i want to see them as successful campus radio dj's.The juniors understand why i am being hard on them and they respect me for doing it.They know the expectations that i want from them and they are fully committed in meeting those expectations.I want them to make goals for themselves in CrC. Not come in without goals.They are eager to broadcast as soon as possible.I let them provided they can handle the training i am giving to them even if i have to be a dick to them.Even as i wrote this Hakim and Nu'man the ones ready to do the opening show are doing their talkset now and want me to vet on it as soon as it is done.That level of commitment i have to be proud of them because they meet my expectations.AGAIN I AM FUCKING PROUD OF THEM.At least i know i have done something right.They understand that i am doing this to bring the best out of them.Something in which i see in them and i don't see in myself before.That level of commitment,passion and sense of urgency.I have to respect them for this.
And by that i am an unfavorable leader trying to prove a point.
Hate me or like me for this doing this it's up to you.Just don't keep it quiet at all and create a rift between us.I don't like it.I am here to learn and willing to accept criticism even if it breaks my heart o hear it.I want to improve.
CrC is not just a cca for me.It's a place where the fire burns inside me.My passion and the determination of my goals that i wanna achieve in my life it's all in there.
I am sorry if this post were to offend anyone but this is how i feel currently right now.If i were to lose friends because of this then it's okay i accept it.I finally felt cheerful that i let it all out.